Zooming with friends

August 2020. The time without friends has been different for Lupe and Liam. Overall I am so, so glad that they are doing ok.  It helps that we now see the grandparents, tios and cousins.  I think it also helps that  I work from home.   I am not away 8 hours. They are so respectful of not bothering me while I work on the first floor but they know if they have a question they can come down and ask me.   I can come at any time to take a peek at what they are doing, and we eat lunch together.   Or I may take my 15 minute break and walk outside to get the mail with them.  I have heard of a family I know where the 12 year old cries herself to sleep at night she misses her friends so much.
Lupe got a phone for her birthday.   I might have delayed that longer if not for the quarantine.   She has been responsible in her work, chores, and helping with Liam.   We now can confidently leave them at home while we go to the store.   And she can text or email her friends.  I am totally ok with that now.

Liam doesn't talk about his friends from school.  If I ask, he will say yes, he misses them, and then mention our friend, and his para educator, Claudia in the same breath.   Friendship is a little more complicated for Liam.  Meaning, he doesn't have the same language skills as others his age, so a lot of the camaraderie is through physical activity and proximity (I know this might be a little more true for young boys in general). Sports has been his social connection for years now as well as the classroom.
He did a Zoom call with a few friends for his birthday which was mostly influenced by wanting his special day to look exactly as Lupe's had a month prior.
Recently I had the idea of doing a Zoom dance party with a friend he's known his whole life but hasn't gone to school with.  They are both dancers by nature.
It was pretty darn cute.  They took turns choosing songs.  When Cielo chose a Taylor Swift song Liam didn't know as well, he grabbed his guitarra and sat and played while she danced.

I help run a support group for parents of teens and adults with disabilities for my work.  I often hear about individuals who don't have a social circle or any friends.   I can't express how HARD this is to hear.  And I wonder... what did those parents do, or not do? And i think, as it relates to my son, is there any way to tell if the friendships will come more naturally in his inclusive school environment with typical peers, or with other children with special needs? Am I doing him a disservice by not developing friendships or having opportunities to socialize with other children with special needs, who might have speech delays, or other differences?  

I imagined I would have to make extra efforts as a mom to host playdates and be proactive with the friendships he has developed on his own at school (which I am so happy he has done on his own!), but now we are social distancing and at home and that summer plan went out the door!

Our family knows how FUN Liam is to be with. He does great impersonations (of characters from his fave movie Sing), he dances really well, is good at board games, and so much more.  But we have spent enough time with him to know that.

I just really hope this *&%! pandemic goes away so we can be social again.