It is 7 am. I should be resting for another hour before I get up at 8 to take a shower, get my breastmilk out of the fridge and head to the hospital. But i'm in bed, next to my trusty breast pump, listening to the neighborhood wake up and starting this blog.
I am writing it with two purposes in mind. Three actually. To help me process all that is going on in la vida de Liam. To update friends and families (gracias a Dios we have such a wide circle, how blessed we are) because honestly it is exhausting to update everyone one by one. And perhaps at some point to share with other parents who are adjusting to having a baby in the NICU, who have an older daughter who is dealing amazingly well with not being able to meet her baby brother, or who are adjusting and coming to terms with and accepting the idea that they have a baby with Down Syndrome.
I see a perfect little human being when I look at my son (how strange to say "my son!"). SOme have said already he looks like his sister. The oxygen being given to him is slowly being weaned which is great news. Feeding is going alright. He latches occassionally and if he won't, I give him a bottle of my milk and try again. Perhaps I'll talk about breastfeeding in another post. I have had to throw all my preconceived notions and expectations out the door and realize that whatever we have to do to just get him home is what needs to happen.
I see a perfect little human being when I look at my son (how strange to say "my son!"). SOme have said already he looks like his sister. The oxygen being given to him is slowly being weaned which is great news. Feeding is going alright. He latches occassionally and if he won't, I give him a bottle of my milk and try again. Perhaps I'll talk about breastfeeding in another post. I have had to throw all my preconceived notions and expectations out the door and realize that whatever we have to do to just get him home is what needs to happen.
Here is a picture of Liam before he went up to the NICU. Before all pictures include tubes for oxygen in his nose, monitoring tubes connected to torso and feet. The precious moments after my life transforming vbac birth. After Lupe's cesarean birth, to have a vaginal birth was the culmination of all my dreams. It was soemthing so sacred and profound, primal and spiritual. Perhaps only moms can understand this. It is hard to describe the feeling of his body slipping out of me in a rush after the intensity of pushing. A dream come true. Thank you to my mom and Pedro for being there and to my oh so special doula Megan for being the support I needed.
Thank you for letting me in, Sara.
ReplyDeleteIs it okay to ask whether or not lam's ds was a surprise?
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sara, for being who you are to your family and to the world.
ReplyDelete